12/13 Again.

Remembering 12/ 13 August back in 2004; Two euphoric days of passion with fellow reformists and the 14th, when we all were gathered like cattle in Dhoonidhoo Detention Centre and more harrowing days in captivation till a disaster freed us from it all.

The trip was worth it. The pain and uncertainty was worth it. The camaraderie, the will to change and losing fear was worth it. The final result was worth it.

Sending my deepest love to my fellow jail mates. (Dhoonidhoo 12/ 13 August 2004 Batch)

My new muse.

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In Britain for Eid

Somehow, some way I've ended up celebrating Eid holidays in Britain this year. Not the nicest of times to be in London, when there is a leaky sky, sulking and weeping making it one of the dampest holidays I've spent lately.

Planning to head out and meet friends in Brighton this Saturday and Sunday, walking around town and shopping at Primers. And Monday, come rain or shine, I plan to head out to London Zoo with little Adam and his mom Mari. This should be some bonding time... not with the animals though... lolz =p

Tuesday, I've saved up to go get my tattoo done. Still checking out the prices... If it costs less than 90 pounds I'm definitely getting one! Funny, in Colombo it costs more... like 300 bucks!! =/Thursday, I'll meet up with friends in South West London and do the pub rounds...

Wednesday heading out to London town with Loretta, crazy woman hahahaha... I'm definitely up for some laughs and to ogle at the blokes... ;-) A woman's gotta do what a woman gotta do... ;-D

On 25th I shall make a trip to the much anticipated Salisbury and hang out with Dave. I can't wait to meet Ting and Kim! I'm gonna go check out the Salisbury cathedral and the famous Stonehenge. After a week with Dave I'll have to head back to London and travel to the beautiful Scotland and stay in Edinburgh for three days and enjoy the winter and it's beautiful landscapes... I just hope that my toes stay calm and don't go all blue and numb!!

So, Britain! Your winter isn't gonna dampen my spirits! =)

Eid with Suraine...

With the Eid holidays just behind, I'm just letting the dust settle down on Ramadan and getting ready to hit the corporate world...

This years Eid was spent with my brother Suraine, since he's disabled he visits rarely and it was awesome having him around though he couldn't hear me or talk to me... We did a bit of dinner-ing and shopping together... That's something both of us love doing! I've never seen him so alive and smiling! I wonder what goes through his mind....? All he does is nod a lot and smile a lot. But what the heck! That comfortable silence, the severe nodding in agreement and the thousand watt smile, it makes my day! =D

He loves perfume so I took him out and bought him a bottle of Hugo Boss. Yeah, we are big on perfumes and scents! ;-) Lol, that just reminded me of the Al Pacino flick, Scent Of a Woman...

Seeing him leave after Eid was really painful... It just squeezed my heart to see him go... Man, I'm gonna miss him terribly!! =( He kept sulking through out... I know he'd miss me even if he couldn't say it... 'Cos even as kids I always understood his language... I don't need sign language with him or a translator... I just know and that's the beauty of being a big sister. But we have lives to live and place to be and money to be earned in a real world.... So till next Eid I bid my other half goodbye... I love you Suraine. =)

Its 12/ 13 again...

This 12/ 13, I send my deepest love, respect and admiration to my fellow jail mates in Dhoonidhoo Detention Unit '04. We fought, protested, cried, laughed and got strength from eachother & braved the torture, suppression and injustice of it all together.. I love you all and hope that we who went through this torture would remain honest and just towards humanity and our nation. Let's all become ONE once again, for we only get one shot at life.. =)

Office Ordeals

Forty percent of the telly addicts in the office spends their time getting drunk on puke that DhiTV like media throws up from the TV downstairs... Ten percent of them spends time frantically loading and reloading credit to their pre-paids and forwarding mass messages that has nothing to do with anything... if they aren't forwarding hoax messages, they are at a coffee break where they moan about how everything is so expensive and they have nothing left in their pockets at the end of the month to pay their bills... yada yada yada...

Ten percent is hardcore and anything they say or others say or do is always associated with their party and they religiously follow their Reeko's and Mahlouf's on the Internet social networks, media and speeches recorded on Cd's. These guys also spend 70 percent of their time in bullying the geeks in their department, to join their party or sticking some bull petition under their noses every other day... These geeks, who, apart from watching Hentai, spends their time playing Red Alert, chat with faceless MSN girls, also does a bit of IT.

Twenty percent of the guys/ girls are on their office phones 60 percent of the time with each other or with another, getting connected romantically or breathing heavily down the phone... their cubicles reek of amateur phone sex, after lunch hours...

The other twenty percent consists of Wahaabee extremists who has Shaikh Fareed recitals of Quran playing in volume two on their desktops, Zakir Nike video's playing on silent mode, on YouTube whilst they sit almost invisible in their cubicles, their eyes following the movement of the chests on all the girls in the office including the big buxom cleaning lady who shares her varicose veins malady with anyone who has an ear to lend... Apparently, according to some reliable sources, some of them operates shady business with the maintenance guys, selling them Viagra, Parachute oil, Marlboro cologne (Now WTF is that???), etc etc...

And then there is me, and a few others who spend 40 percent on Facebook, Twitter, Flicker and Blogspot... Writing, researching, posting, bugging and what not...

I wonder at this rate, how the office actually runs... Not on Parachute Oil for sure... =/

This day, two years back...

This day, two years back I lost a love, a soul mate, 80% of my life, the reason I smile, breathe and live, the most beautiful person that ever existed in my life... Time, people and the world will surely change, but this love has and will forever remain and grow long after his death...

I wonder how it's like for you Hassan...

I wonder, if you, in your non-existence still see me... even if I don't see you...

I wonder if you still stand beside me and watch me laugh out loud like crazy and make a total fool of myself. Does it still hurt your ears, the ringing of my laughter? I swear I'll live in a world of silence if only you were here to share it with me...

I wonder if you still come over to my door to hide my shoes... you know I still keep a pair at the door out of habit, wishing you'd come and hide them, just to bug me once more...? I will keep all my 28 pairs outside for you to hide them if I it could make you come back...

I wonder whether you still hover over my shoulder when I'm cooking and check and re-check to see if I've added the garlic’s that you like so much and I would say yes every time and you don't find them on your plate at dinner later... I want to fight about the garlic’s Hassan. Yes, please do come back, I'll add the garlic’s and onions and all the spices in the world for you... Let's have one last dinner with me...

I wonder if you still stare at my old teddy bear and make that disgusting face... I know that it was you who doodled a moustache with your Redleaf pen on him... though you denied every time that you were jealous of an old teddy... You know, I wasn't mad at you at all... I found it sweet that you wanted me for yourself... I am here Hassan. I am yours. Please come back... =(

I wonder whether you still sneak in late at night and lie next to me while I'm lost in my dreams and nightmares, yearning for your familiar warmth and you, smell my hair, fall asleep and disturb my slumber with your snoring!! I miss your snoring and the noises you make when you come in late at night and the several excuses...You can bring the frigging ceiling down with your noise... I won't care! I'll give my life to hear you snore beside me once more... =( Make noise Hassan, let me hear you once more... =(

It's strange how missing someone could terribly turn a woman so helpless and insane. I wish I have been ready for such loneliness, despair and emptiness... But then again, sometimes loneliness is the only comfort that feels alright because my loneliness revolves around you Hassan... It feels so damn good to love you and miss you! Thank you, for just being even if it's with the angels up there... I love you.