What makes a person?

I had a problem growing up. I grew up fearless and independent. Curious and rebellious. There was no particular culture around me except for utter chaos and mayhem. Sometimes the chaos around you are what makes you strong or weak I guess. I braved every fall and shushed my silent cries, and filled my little brain with the people around me, their thoughts, their smells, their tastes, their happiness, their religions, their inner turmoils, their hatred and their ever confusing love. Yes, I was a child who actually stopped to smell the flowers and who listened to the bees in the gardens.

What makes a person? Music, books, poetry, arts and my belief in love made me who I am today. Bob Dylan changed the way I perceived men and the world in general. Paul Simon taught me about love and separations. Jim Morrison emitted the dark energy that made me the wild woman I am today. Pablo Neruda squeezed the passion filled verses that poured out of my being. Gabriel Garcia Marquez made me fantasize, reach out to my jumbled thoughts and made me fall in love with mystic reality. John Lennon made me humble and taught me humility and revolution. Bob Marley taught me that no revolution is complete without music and brotherhood.

Naifaru Dhohokko made me sing like a woman with her heart bleeding on a carpet of thorns.The passion filled voice of Huvarafushi Fareeda and Jameela Hassan brought drama and tragedy into my life. The great Janis Joplin made me the fearless bitch with character and emotional breakdowns. Jimi Hendrix made me go on trips on a psychedelic magic carpet ride that a normal girl wouldn't dare go...

Vincent Van Gogh taught me that only the insane can truly feel life and create it for the eyes of the beholder. My mother taught me to become the strong women I am today and taught me not to be defeated by adversity. My grandmother showed me the comfort of friends and held my hand forever like a true friend. My brother Srayn taught me that nothing, not even disability should prevent you from living your life and loving it!

Omer Khayyam got me intoxicated with his wine and lust filled poetry. Salman Rushdi fascinated me with the written word and it's power. Isabella Allende made me fall in love with anything and everything Latin American. B B King, Nina Simon and Buddy Guy opened up the world of Blues and Jazz for me.

From Anni, I learned that dreams are achievable even if we get one shot at life and the craziness and strength of the enormous burden and responsibility to save a nation on the verge of social and political destruction at any cost. Bambukeyo Hassan, Bless him, lighted a fire inside me that wouldn't go out. He gave me the zest for life, beats of music, the colors of the rainbow that I paint on my canvas, love and death in my poetry, humor, life's hilarity and the will to live and never give up!

I'm glad that my life was influenced by all of them. They all left a lasting impact on my music, arts, creativity, poetry and the way I write, think and love. I am me, with all my flaws and tortured soul because of them.

I am the most content, if not, the happiest woman on this planet right now. =)

Walk of Life...

This day should be Daddy's Day!

It is true that sometimes Parents do learn from their children too. Today my daddy took part in his first ever rally to mark Democracy Day. About time too! Guess it's never too late... I would be lying to myself if I said I did not feel proud of him! I saw the flush of emotions on his face and his excitement in finally walking his walk!

I was a few months inside my mom when my 19 year old daddy was first taken to jail. He was never told the reason why, till this day! History did repeat itself years later. I knew how my young father would have felt subjected to torture, with a 14 year old child wife back home a few months pregnant, when I was thrown into jail after Black Friday and so on for the next three years.

Years of torture and financial issues had broken down many a men of my fathers generation, that it shames them that they were so tied to this parasite called fear instilled by a mad man. It slowly fed on whatever was left of their dignity, courage and hope... It made me weep ever since I really could weep and understand why the tears were being shed.

Some fight their inner fights silently, when others need to stand up and roar. Either way it isn't a smooth ride for anyone. A revolution cannot be brought without giving your heart, soul or life. That is why heroes are few among us. Heroes, because, few in the world are capable of standing up to authority, brutality, pain, injustice and few can completely release every ounce of fear in their being for the sake of freedom.

Today he stood beside me tall, confident and sure of his self with a twinkle in his eyes. I knew that moment that he had after all, finally, faced his demons and come to terms with life's many injustices and let downs. I guess we are even now. And we hugged. We hugged for all the time we lost, for all that he couldn't bestow upon his daughter, for all our shattered dreams, our failures, our struggles, the tortures, the jails we were confined to, and for the great love and kindness we felt for the living being. We can be changed by what happens to us. We refuse to be reduced by it... We are healed. We have a smile in our hearts, we are ready to grow old now and death, come when it may... I love my father more and more each day.

Love like change is constant.